What I've been doing on this past 1 year besides lecture is organization and committee (besides Youtube and Blog). Actually, I don't really like to meet people. It's not about the people, I just don't comfortable. This working from home situation is a blessing to me. I can sleep more and of course not meeting people, don't have to make some excuse. So why u do a bunch of organizations and committees that required meet people? 

Yeah to put it short, in the first year we got doctrine to join this and that. It's kinda true but..., if you overdo it you'll feel that and this committee is no worth it anymore. They told us if we join this and that it'll benefit us. Yes, it's true, friendship, and kind-related to academics. But I think just don't overdo it and only on your faculty community. If you do that, it'll make you realize it gives nothing (include skp) but only drained your body. 

It was a good choice I've made to force me to the university community, RKIM. Full of inspiring people. Shame on me why not choosing a larger community at the first gathering :/. 

I do feel like wasting time put my time on one of the organizations I joined. I thought if I joined this so I have a competition partner. But ah nothing, just doing a bunch of programs, which... . I mean why put effort to train outsider than an insider. How can we claimed "...", right it's a self claim, duh. Also, an outsider is more bright than an insider. I envy the other universities' organizations, they really a community that has the same goals. Of course, I was told this and that person to let me join if there's a competition, but I feel I've left out. Yeah, at least that's what my feeling towards them. With this bunch of experience, why no one asks me seriously to join the competition. I've been invited to 2 groups and no new until now lmao. Also why outsider is more bright, that makes me realized if it's no use I join this thing. 

Yall I think after demise, should I join again and fix the problem I felt or just ignored, but why I should care if urself is broken too. Ah, I don't know but one thing for sure I won't overdo committee again, 1 only at a time. Do my Youtube and Blog, because that's what I love to do, also competition.

I don't know what to do, but there are 2 years left. I'll try to burn the spirit of me. Ok now start looking for competition and recruit some. I know I kinda look like too forced myself, I mean it's no problem if I don't join something, but I realized why I want to register the first time. Yeah, it's should be a refreshing event right? I think at this age, writing is the main thing about how I expressed feelings and ideas... so that why I really want to join the competition. If not doing what I passionate about I feel like becoming a zombie. Just walk past this term... then I regret it. Ok myself, you doing good, you got 1 winning certificate this year. So it's good sign :) Keep try!